Nose Hairs

Men: Yes, facial hair is acceptable – as in beard or mustache – NOT as in long, rope-like strands streaming out of your disgusting nostrils. Let me ask, do you own a mirror? Do you not wash your face and shave or trim in front of it? The next time you do, hopefully today, you need to focus on those hairy, nasty little areas above your lip and under your nasal passages, and clip those little bastards into extinction. How can you look in the mirror everyday, and obliviously but continuously miss those offensive protrusions is beyond my logical comprehension. Dude, the customary Cro-magnon, along with your Armani suit, just doesn’t work.
Women: You can spot a hair out of place on another woman from 100 yards away, so stop with the nose hair blindness. Use that inherent, laser-like, search and destroy mentality for a good cause for all of mankind – which is scanning, honing in, and telling your man of his hair out of place – from his nostrils. Thank you for your service.

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