How frightening is it when you very reluctantly let someone take a picture of you, citing your reluctance because of how non-photogenic you are ... and sure enough the picture is horrific and the picture-taker says, "come on, the picture looks just like you."

I understand parents that brag about their child - as far as the kid's academic or sports achievements - since the kid had everything to do with it. But how can they justify bragging about the kid's height, since the kid had nothing to do with it?

It was reported that Selena Gomez had a breakdown. Does that qualify as actual news? That's like reporting fighting broke out in the middle east.

It's interesting how those sissy little socks called anklets that girls only used to wear are now worn by men. Incredible.

You are no longer allowed to wear flip-flops if you have ugly, disgusting, warped toenails resembling potato chips. You are no longer allowed to wear flip-flops if you have ugly, disgusting thick calloused heels. Oh, almost forgot, you are no longer allowed to wear flip-flops if they make that annoying, rude, chinese-water-torture flip-flopping noise with every … Continue reading New Rules for Flip-Flops

As George Carlin said, “after you’re past a certain age, baseball bubble gum cards become cards with pictures of other men on them.” It’s kind of the same concept here with grown men wearing Howard, Utley, and McNabb shirts. Really, guy?

I love your “Love You – Hate You” segment, but please (bleep) the lunatics (bleep) in (bleep) to curse. When they (bleep), you (bleep) to bleep what they say, and when you bleep what (bleep) they say, it (bleep) their rant INDECIPHERABLE! Translation: I love your “Love You – Hate You” segment, but please instruct … Continue reading Note to Preston and Steve at Philly Radio Station WMMR

I have a problem with those news story headlines that ask a question. You know the ones: Has Kirsty Alley been fired over her weight? Is there a link between cell phones and cancer? Is Bill doubting Hillary’s chances? Was there a Bigfoot sighting? You know what, Mr. and Mrs. Journalist, do some damn research, … Continue reading Do Some Damn Research

At what point do fat, sloppy guys gaze into the mirror and say, “Geez, I’m fat and sloppy, and I need something to help my overall look. I know, I’ll get an earring.” Sorry, dude, it’s not working.

We all cough occasionally, but put enough people in an area (classroom, auditorium, church), and it's an epidemic. It won’t go cough-free for more than 20 seconds. Try counting to 20 until someone coughs, and see how many times you’ll have to start over. It's uncoughingbelievable.